Busy busy bee

My new job is a little more crazy than I had imagined. When I'm not working I'm laying down because I'm exhausted. I know one thing that just is not for me in a full career, retail. Standing on my feet for 7-8 hours a day is not fun. I've met some interesting people but all of them ask the same question when I tell them I have graduated from college: Why are you here? And I simple stay, a lady has to survive. Just gotta survive.

Thankfully, in between shifts at the clothing store I've been contacted by another employer. I've gone on two interviews, taken a test for them, and on Tuesday I go in for a panel interview and hopefully they offer me the job. I think they really like me, and they seem excited. This job contains benefits and retirement. And I would be doing something that has to do with my major and not feeling like I failed at adult life. Hoping for good news on Tuesday after my interview. All I have to do is impress three more people, including the director of the finance department and the human resources department. Both of which I'd be working closely with.

So good vibes and well wishes, please send them my way.

Well... I have a job

This morning I was awoken by Lee Brice singing about how he was "Hard to Love." Turns out he wasn't actually there and it was my phone going off. The man I interviewed with last week where I basically told him I was a hopeless case and didn't know what I wanted in life decided he either 1) really liked my honesty or 2) took pity on me. Either way, I'M EMPLOYED!!!!

Now, it's only part time at the moment. I mean let's face it, no one is hiring accountants right now, a girl needs money so a filler job will have to do. But, it's a job!

I go in on Friday for orientation and start on Tuesday. It should be interesting to see how it goes. I'm excited, and really not in the least bit nervous. Surprisingly.

But, I have a job!!!!

I'll leave you with this video so you can hear what it was that I woke up to this morning.

The future is an unknown place

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

That question has been asked to me multiple times during my interviews and finally yesterday I gave the man the most honest and perfect answer ever and here it is:

You know, I'm not entirely sure. If you would have asked me that 5 months ago I would have told you in an office building working at my desk going through the financials of a business and helping them keep their books perfectly. However, upon graduation and now 5 months to think about it, I don't know where I want to be. I have this degree and I don't know exactly how it is that I want to use it because no one will give me a chance to use it.

He looked at me for a minute and then he did the weirdest thing; he agreed. He said we put so much emphasis on going to college so that we can get better and improve our lives, but we also entrust the decision of what we want to do for the rest of forever with our still teenaged self. He had two degrees and is now working in a field that has nothing to do with them. Funny how that works out?

I'm not saying I am questioning the degree I obtained, I'm more reflecting on what it is I really see myself doing.

I've always heard to not plan out your life too much because it can change in an instant, and until just recently I never really believed that.


Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

Me? I just want to be happy.

Big girl world is busy

Being busy with big girl stuff has made me forget to take a breather and enjoy the little things in life. I've had weddings to attend, interviews to go on, and applications to send out. And with my alma mater starting back up with classes today, I've got nothing but reminders of how I'm no longer care free. This is where still living in a college town has it's down sides. You are constantly reminded of feeling old for being finished with school, but then also feeling like a loser for not having a job.

I went on an interview just yesterday, and I hope it works out. I interviewed with people who were maybe 6 years older than myself, so right then I knew I would feel better about working there. Something about working with people closer to my age just makes me more confident. The interview went okay, I know it could have gone better. And it certainly could have gone worse. In the next few days they will be making their decision and I will be finding out if I can finally say I am an employed college graduate or not. Let's all keep our fingers crossed that good news comes my way soon.

This weekend I have another wedding to attend. That's two weekends back to back. This one is for my 18 year old cousin. Yes, you read correctly 18. She just graduated high school in May. I'm going because it will be fun to hear all of the comments my aunt has to say about the wedding. She called me this week and told me she expects a wedding invitation within the next year. Let's slow down there ma'am, I don't need another timeline added to my life.

I have this feeling that if I just get a job my life will be better. And I'm sure it will. If I can just find a job to keep my busy and give me money so that I'm not constantly worried I will be great. I will feel like I have accomplished something and have proven all of my professors, who told me I wouldn't succeed, wrong. I just need that, for me.

Toddlers and Tiaras: scary kids make great costumes

For the past few years our country has been introduced to a new and exciting lifestyle that has some cringing in horror while others (like myself) are embracing the lifestyle if only for the entertainment value. We have been given a glimpse into this world that no one can fully understand unless you are in the middle of this mystical glitter filled world. Know what I'm talking about yet?

That's right, Toddlers & Tiaras. Every Wednesday night people all across the United States tune in to see what random theme these pageant directors can come up with and what high school gymnasium they can rent out to put these "glitz" pageants on. Has anyone ever noticed that? For these pageant moms (and some dads) spending all this money to put their wonderful princesses in a pageant you'd think their thousands of dollars could help with decorations or a crown that doesn't look as though it was made for a toy store. Maybe I'm too judgmental, but come on.

Though, what takes the cake in this whole show are those darling little angels we like to call the participants. These young girls are thrown into a world where they are painted up with make up, given fake teeth, and squeezed into dresses that sometimes cost more than my rent for half a year. All the while they are allowed to practically run their households. A five year old child running a home telling her mom she's stupid all the while throwing those tantrums until her mother caves giving her all the pixy sticks she can eat.

I think I watch this show because I am so fascinated by how the family dynamic works. These parents say they love their children but everything they seem to be doing is showing they don't really care about their daughter's futures. I don't have anything against extra curricular activities, I do however have a problem with telling your daughter she must look one way in order to be considered pretty. And starting at such a young age means you're putting that into their minds when they are just starting to figure out the world around them. Even worse is how these parents refuse to discipline their daughters even in the least. In my mother's words "No one is going to want to play with them because they're such bitches." And I agree, I'm all for telling your kids they are perfect and wonderful, everyone should do this, however when you give them the ideal that they can do no wrong and walk all over adults and that outward beauty is the only thing that matters, that's a problem.

I know if I was a kid and one of these girls started acting better than me and just being rude, I'd never be her friend. The sad reality is, where these mothers think they are helping their children they are doing far from it. I can't wait for the episode Toddlers & Tiaras: Ten Years Later where these girls are alone with no true friends and thinking they own the world or they're knocked up and still screaming at their mothers. 

I don't appreciate the mothers of the show but I still watch. It's like the car wreck you can't look away from. And this is why I will be dressing as one of these participants for Halloween. If anything, it'll be a great laugh and if someone gets mean, I can just call them stupid and cry until they give me some alcohol. 

You don't own Ryan Lochte

If you walked into my house right now the first thing you would notice is how, probably just like half of the world, my television is tuned to the Olympics.

I am a lover of all sports so I certainly don't discriminate. In the past four days I have watched Cameron Van Der Burgh break the world record in the 100m breaststroke, many indoor and beach volleyball matches, Tom Daley having his swimsuit slide down below his butt after a dive, Great Britain  achieve their first medal in gymnastics in a very long time, and even some water polo and equestrian too. To put it lightly I'm a fan. 

One thing that does bother me is the idea of superiority that some fans have when their "favorite" becomes famous. It really parallels everyone's attitude's about bands going "mainstream" or "selling out." So what, you knew about Ryan Lochte four years ago, it doesn't mean you own the right to being his fan. Oh, you've followed men's rowing since you were born so obviously anyone else liking them is an abomination to the world of fans. Get over yourself. Instead of getting your panties in a wad over your favorite athlete getting new fans, shouldn't you be happy that he or she is doing amazing thus gaining the new fans you despise so much? Can we all just appreciate this:

Ryan Lochte celebrating his gold medal.

I thought so. 

This man, won a gold medal, and it doesn't matter if you knew about him when he came out of the womb or if you just became a fan because he won gold for the best country in the world, 'Merica. Let's all just have a beer and join in on a mutual chant of USA! and be happy for these athletes. 

Home?

After spending a week at my parents house moping on my ability to be everyone's second choice for a job, I started wondering what it is I'm actually doing with my life. I graduated from a well respected university in arguably one of the hardest degrees in their business school, but I'm still second best. (I recently was told I was overqualified for a job but they wished they could hire me) As I sat in my parents living room I looked around and thought of everything that has happened in the last four years.

When I graduated high school I wasted no time running out of my home town and into the arms of living on my own. I embraced my new found independence and never looked back. I disliked where I had grown up and really had no ties to the people I would be leaving behind. I joked that if I had stayed I would be married and in the nursing program by my age. It's a growing theme in my hometown to do just that.

So now fast forward 4 years.

I'm living alone, sending out resumes to at least fifteen people a week, no job, minimal social life, and living off of corn dogs and 100 calorie packs of cookies. My mother asked me what I would do if I was unable to find a job in my current city and I told her the same answer I've been having to tell myself: "I don't know." Many people want me to move back to my hometown, and it's not that bad of a possibility. Can you really always go home? 


Maybe it's my pride or my desire to be independent, but I feel as though I will be almost giving up or showing I'm not as accomplished as I think if I moved home. It was never an option that I would move home after I graduated. I know a lot of people who that was their plan all along. It was never mine. But with the economy going down and not as many people hiring in a professional setting where I am, it's looking as though this will have to be considered an option soon.

How difficult is a transition from being in college on your own to living in your parents house again? Could I handle that transition and not want to rip my hair out? I hope I don't have to find out.

Weddings: All the cool kids are doing it

If you were to walk into my house and look at the fridge you'd think I was the girl from 27 Dresses. You know, the "always a bridesmaid, never a bride." Don't get me wrong, if it meant I'd have a killer body like Katherine Heigl, I'd take that job in a heart beat. But seriously,  wedding invites, engagement parties, save the dates, they all litter my fridge. It's as if everyone has graduated college and are in a race to get to the altar.

Last one there's an ugly bride.

I wish everyone so much happiness that I hope it makes them sick. But could we have planned it better so I don't feel horrible about myself for every weekend in August? Yes, I have a wedding to attend EVERY weekend in August. And me, being the quiet wallflower who enjoys eavesdropping on conversation has decided to attend probably every single one. But, that's okay I do enjoy watching weddings (read that as eating the food) and I'm sure it will be amazing tolerable. However with weddings, comes gifts and that is the worst part as a guest.

The gift ultimately shows how much I love the couple.

I have an engagement party to attend Friday. And have yet to figure out a gift. Honestly, I'm more worried about my outfit. I mean let's be honest, I need a killer outfit to hide the fact that my boyfriend has yet to put a ring on it. I'm only half way kidding. I'm not in a rush to get married, but I do get self conscious about it. I don't necessarily want to get married right now, it's a scary thought, but I don't want to be left out of the crowd.

I guess the real reason I'm so uptight about all these weddings is I'm scared for my friends.

With everyone getting married so young, they don't really know who they are or what it is they want to actually do. And with growing up in the South it was the "it" thing to do, get married young and pop out babies. The divorce rate is so high these days and I don't want to see another of my friends having to go through a divorce before they are 25. It's not a nice situation for anyone, even worse when you're still young. I just wish where I'm from, it was more socially acceptable to marry later in life and not feel the pressure to start a family. That's a big reason I go to my hometown so rarely, I get hounded every place I go about when I'm going to settle down and start popping out tiny humans.

Sadly it's not "lady-like" to tell old women to shove it and keep their noses out of your business.

New beginnings

Yesterday I embarked on a new journey in life; I like to call it "The Real Post Graduate World." Even though I have been a college graduate since May, I have finally come to terms with actually being a college graduate. I had a real interview, for a real job at a very big building who deals with very large amounts of money. After what was thought to be a promising conversation with the head of the department and being given a tour of the office I would work in and even being shown where my desk would be, I was shown the door and told where to go to see a job counselor. Yes, they kicked me out after saying how amazing and wonderful I was and told me I should apply for other jobs. This is a growing theme for me this summer. I blame the idea that the older generations have right now about young adults. I have been told by many individuals they would love to hire me, however because of their bias opinions about how lazy, idiotic, self-centered, lack of drive, and all around horrible my generation is I am being punished. Don't get me wrong, I have procrastinated on a project or two in my lifetime, but I like to think I am none of those. I graduated with an Accounting degree in four years, I live on my own, and have very big dreams. Due to some careless individuals who have not made the wisest of decisions we are all grouped together into this stereotype. And because of this, I am suffering. The world spins madly on...

With my employment status being nonexistent I've decided to go on as many cheap or free adventures that I can until I become a slave to a job. Tomorrow I start on my journey. I don't know where my shoes will take me, but I do know that no matter where I go it will be one heck of a ride... er walk.